World Mental Health Day 2022
by Mags Ryan
As we approach World Mental Health Day, each of us are given an opportunity to reflect on what mental health means to us and how we engage with our own or another’s mental health challenges. Our mental health refers to how we think, act and feel about ourselves, others and different situations. It can shape our self-confidence and self-esteem, and our outlook on life. It can also shape how we support ourselves at our times of struggle. Our mental health can have an impact on whether we care for, respect and value our own experiences as we strive to live authentically and try to fully embrace who we really are. Or it can serve to keep our most vulnerable selves hidden and apart from our families and friends, and even ourselves.
The theme for Mental Health Green Ribbon Campaign Month focuses on shame and reducing mental health stigma. Shame is a very powerful emotion that inhibits and isolates us, evoking a feeling that something about us is unacceptable and is to be kept hidden. Shame can make it very difficult for us to believe we can change, as deep in our being we feel that something about us is flawed, that we are not good enough. Shame can be felt in many aspects of our lives but when we begin to look at our experiences of our mental health or ill health in connection with feelings of shame, we can find it difficult to reach out and seek help.
Stigma in mental ill health arises when people are viewed negatively and are treated differently because of their illness, often arising from fear and a lack of understanding of mental health issues (MakeItOK.org). This experience of stigma, and the shame and vulnerability that can follow, can be compounded when we internalise these judgements, see ourselves as less than, as unworthy of love, belonging or connection. Brene Brown states that for shame to grow, it relies on ‘secrecy, silence and judgement.’ Working with people experiencing mental health challenges or mental ill health, we at Knock Counselling Centre understand that fear of being judged contributes to not disclosing illness to all but very close family or friends. If we apply Brown’s understanding of how shame grows to the experience of mental illness, we can understand that secrecy, silence and judgement can serve to intensify the painful, and human, experiences and struggles people are living with every day.
So, what can help? Brene Brown asserts that "If we share our story with someone who responds with empathy and understanding, shame can't survive." Sometimes a good friend can support us through difficult times, sometimes it is a Counsellor that that can help us better understand, manage and grow through our struggles. At other times it is our GP or Mental Health Team that can supports us when we are feeling unwell or are in crisis. What we know is that if we feel heard and respected, if we feel empathy and genuineness from another, if we feel held and accepted in those moments, we ‘will be able to cope with the problems of life more adequately and more comfortably’ (Carl Rogers, ‘On Becoming a Person’). The important first step is in reaching out to seek help, which is not an easy undertaking. There are many statutory and community services that offer support in times of difficulty and what suits one person may not be the best fit for another. However, it is in reaching out that we begin take the steps to better health and well-being, to the process of accepting who we are in all our capacities, and to allowing us to be who we really are, a human being who happens to be struggling at present.